Why You Don't Let OCs Have A Camera
by Chilly Academic IV
Summary: My OCs a lot of 'em get hold of a camera, and humor insues. Rated T for language and later shonenai yaoi slash. shojoai jokes in ch. 3
1. Chapter 1: Myrmidon Ahoy

**Why You Don't Let OCs Have A Camera**

**Chapter 1: Myrmidon Ahoy**

_**A/N: Hi. n.n Long time no see. Well, here I am, with a humor-fic. All these characters are mine, so... If you don't recognize them, that's why. ... Erm... Disclaimer anyone?**_

_**Rose: U-um. S-she doesn;t own f-fire e-mblem, but the c-c-characters are, um, hers. hurries off**_

"Is my bandanna straight?" a nomadic trooper said to a nearby mercenary, while tying his bandanna on over his messy brown hair.

"I don't see why it needs to be, you aren't," replied the one clothed in dark red, currently lounging on a blanket, his sword nearby.

"Damien!"

"Yo! Guys, camera rolling here!" A myrmidon with dark-purple hair was holding a small video camera in his right hand, pointed at the nomadic trooper, who jumped a little bit, then turned to the camera, smiling his best fake smile.

"Oh, hello," he laughed lightly, "and welcome. I'm Talirei. This is going to be the run-down of the numerous people in our camp, and I guarantee, this won't be the last time that you see us!" The nomadic trooper said in a rather cheesy announcer voice, motioning over the large area behind him, where numerous people were.

"First, you'll meet our resident mercenary!"

"What the hell? Get that camera off me!" the mercenary said, as the lens soon found itself in his eye, thanks to the myrmidon's poor camera skills. Then there's a lovely shot of the blue sky while the myrmidon gets pushed backwards, landing with a thump. Then the nomadic trooper peers over, with the fake smile still in tact.

"... Well, it seems Damien's not in the mood to be filmed right now. So... Maybe we'll get him when he's asleep."

"You better not," the mercenary could be heard saying from off-screen, and the sound of a sword being picked up, followed by footsteps.

"Geish, is he not getting any sex from his little bitch-monk, or what?"

"Klaei! Be nice."

A shot of the ground and the myrmidon grumbling as he stands up, then a shot of Talirei once again, trying not to look like he's about to hurt someone, but instead looking like he's on a coffee-high. "Well, next up on our list of escaped mental ward patients is that snoozing sage over there."

The camera turned and focused on a purple-haired male, who looked very much like a female, leaning against a tree, sleeping quietly, his lavender cape being used as a blanket/pillow. Our lovely host giggled slightly, looking to the sage, then to the camera. "We caught him in his weekly sleeping moment. This is Lavender, the one-fourth Sacaen sage. Isn't he just adorable when he's sleeping like that?"

The camera turned and zoomed on the sleeping sage, then turned back to the host, now looking less coffee-high and smiling a bit more realistically, tucking a few stray strands of hair under his blue bandanna.

"Next is probably the one we'll have the hardest time getting on film, shy little thing. Her name's Rose and she's a cleric, and she's scared of most guys, so as you can tell, our two-man crew might have a little difficulty getting her on our documentary."

The nomadic trooper turned and looked over the camera, then he muttered, "There she is!"

The camera immediately turned and focused on the form of a cleric, zooming in as far as possible to get her on film before she noticed. In her left hand was a stave, and in her right, some holy book. Her hair was a bright, rose-red and she wore all white. She blinked before looking up and noticing the camera on hey, jumped, dropped her book, hurried to pick it up, then rushed off, all in a blurry dash of white and red. The camera then turned back to the host, but was still zoomed so we get a lovely look at his pores, before the myrmidon quickly fixed the zoom.

"Well, at least we got a glance of her, right? Now, on to-"

"Hey, Talirei, we're running out of battery here."

"Didn't you charge it?"

"I told you to!"

"You did not!" the host said, stomping his foot, his hands on his hips.

"Did to!"

"Did n-"

Cut to black.

A/N: Sorry it's short. ; It's just kind of a teaser for the main thing. Review! ... Please?


	2. Chapter 2: Of Annoying Blonde Thieves an...

**Why You Don't Let OCs Have A Camera**

**Chapter 2: Of Annoying Blonde Thieves and Bathing Swordmasters**

_**A/N: Hullo there! And welcome to the second installment of chaos. This is chapter 2 of my story. Disclaimer?**_

_**Larx: Lindsay Suzanne does not own Fire Emblem, Nintendo does. But all characters featured or mentioned are either hers of her friend, Chibi's.**_

"Hello? Hello? Is this thing on?" the nomadic trooper said, tapping the lens with his finger repetitively. The myrmidon looked through the lens and nodded to Talirei.

"Shooting, Talirei!"

"Hello, and welcome to part two of our-"

"Wait! The red light's blinking. Does that mean-"

Cut to black.

"I thought you charged the battery last night, Klaei!"

"You know very well I was preoccupied!"

"You mean," said a thief, sitting cross-legged on a log that substituted as a couch in the camp until further modernizations could be made for their comfort, "that you two were so wrapped up in each other that you neglected to remember the camera... We all know what you do at night, you're not at all quiet about it."

Both of them blushed... And then they realized that the camera, sitting on a rock, was turned on them, and blushed darker, then Klaei looked to the thief, livid.

"You knew that camera was on... Didn't you?" the voice was practically a growl, showing how angry the myrmidon truly was at the blonde-haired thief, who tried to look innocent, but failed, most likely, on purpose.

"Me? Why, of course not."

"Why you little-"

The nomadic trooper had to grab hold of the myrmidon to keep him from attacking the thief who, quickly and wisely, fled into the nearby forest. After the target- I mean, thief- was out of sight, and the myrmidon was not as rabid as he was before, and he took the camera, and started filming once again.

"Hello again! It's me, Talirei," our favorite nomadic trooper host said, smiling falsely at the camera once again, half-waving and trying not to seem angered. "And that thief you just saw was Larx, our resident thief..."

"Who is going to die soon," came the voice of the myrmidon behind the camera, before he was silenced by one of Talirei's trademark 'shut-your-mouth-this-second-or-I-will-shoot-you' glares, which quickly melted back into one of his fake smiled when he looked back at the camera.

"Today, there's someone we've wanted to get on film for a long time on our list to hunt down, and he's number one. He's a swordmaster, named Kana. And we got a tip from one of our nutcases that he was headed towards the nearby waterfall pond this morning, he likes to go there to meditate, and he's been rather perturbed about the whole idea of being on camera. Let's go!"

Cut to black.

Cut to scene of Talirei crouching down behind a tree. He glanced back at the camera, pressing his finger to his lips, telling the myrmidon behind the camera to be absolutely silent. The camera then turned to the tall waterfall that lead to a small pool, first noticing the blue clothing (and sword, as well,) on the ground, then the sword master, waist high in the water, thoroughly soaked, with water dripping off his shoulders and down his back. Talirei couldn't help staring, making our camera-myrmidon a little annoyed, but neither said anything.

The swordmaster didn't notice. He was wringing a little of the water out of his dark blue hair, which was extremely long, and trailed down into the water, revealing his pale-skinned back, not exactly muscular, but by no means scrawny. There was a pause, and then the swordmaster looked over his shoulder, revealing the numerous scars on his face, but also sharp, blue eyes.

The camera-myrmidon and our favorite host began slowly creeping back, until the swordmaster looked away, and they ran all the way back to camp.

"Whoo!" Talirei said, smiling. "We got away! That was definitely a rarity... Well, now we're safe.."

"Oh," said a hoarse voice from behind them, making Talirei look rather frightened, "are you?"

Shot of the swordmaster, dressed, now, standing behind the nomadic trooper, his sword resting against Talirei's throat.

"Damn, he's fast," commented the camera-myrmidon.

Cut to black.

Cut to Damien, the mercenary, as host, standing in front of the camera, smirking rather obviously. The thief, Larx, is the current camera-man.

"Hello, and welcome to 'Why Idiots Don't Get Cameras'. These are two oh so _poor, pitiful _idiots that missed the first lesson, Talirei and Klaei."

The camera turned to two cots, revealing that they're inside a tent, and on those two cots, are a rather banged-and-bruised nomadic trooper, and a myrmidon looking like he was run over by a herd of huge horses, which were all overweight Clydesdales. The latter was unconscious at the moment, and the nomadic trooper was sitting semi-upright, glaring.

"Shut up, Damien, and get that damn camera off me."

"Now, now, Talirei, calm down. It's all in good fun... Don't we need to warn our audiences? Don't want a repeat performance, do we?"

"Shut up."

With that, and a rude gesture involving the nomadic trooper's middle finger (even though it was bandaged and bleeding), filled the camera lens, and then the nomadic trooper turned away.

"Well, as you can see, it's better not to annoy bathing swordmasters, you end up like these two. Don't repeat their mistakes."

Cut to black.

A/N: Much longer, and hopefully funnier. Review, please?


	3. Chapter 3: Cross Dressing and Perverted ...

**Why You Don't Let OCs Have A Camera**

**Chapter 3: Cross Dressing and Perverted Innkeepers**

_**A/N: Hi. ... Minor shoujo-ai . Disclaimer?**_

_**Kana: ... She does not own Fire Emblem.**_

Camera switches on and looks around the camp, showing the season has changed. Where once apple trees were in blossom, they are now bearing almost grown fruit. Buttercups and dandelions and daisies dot the fields in the background, creating a peaceful scene...

"YOU WANT ME TO DO WHAT?"

The camera swung around, focusing on Lavender, the formerly sleeping sage, talking to Talirei, our former host and nomadic trooper.

"Well, it was a tip from one of the travelers that passed us recently... He said the innkeeper at the nearest town charges less if there more pretty girls in the group that's staying, and, well, of the guys, you probably look the most girlish of us all..."

"But I refuse to CROSSDRESS! ... Again."

A few snickers arose from the crew at the added 'again' comment, and the camera swung around and noted the light flush on Kana's scarred face. If only they had possessed the camera back then, oh, the blackmail...

"Besides, the guy's probably a pervert and will grope me," retorted the sage, folding his arms over his chest, and huffing indignantly.

"Oh, but Lavender, you'd make such a pretty girl. I'll lean you my light purple dress, even," came a mocking voice from just off screen , and the camera shifted slightly to show a woman in a two piece, green, two-piece dress, with short, black hair to her shoulders, and a smirk on her face. A dancer.

"Shut _up, _Sophia!" he barked, before looking at the camera, blinking a little, before he made the realization that it was turned on, and filming everything. "KLAEI! I swear to Saint Elimine, I'm going to _snap. Your. Neck._"

Lavender's hand covering the camera. Cut to black.

Camera switched on and reveals the company, even the ones yet to be introduced on the dysfunctional little reality show, en route to the next town. The camera-holder, the usual myrmidon, was somewhere in the middle of the decently large group, and also on the back of a horse, or, actually, wyvern, as you could see the swishing tail on screen occasionally. The camera then fell towards one of the pack horses, used outside of battle for item carrying and transportation purposes, who was currently carrying the sage... Who was by no means dressed as a sage. He wore a two-part dress, humorously enough after eventually being convinced that it would be better to cross dress and save the gold, he preferred that option to getting used as a decoy next time they ended up in battle, which wouldn't be too far away, with their lackluster luck. He was forced to ride sidesaddle, and was one of few allowed to ride the horse, since he had injured his ankle earlier that day, as was revealed by the bandages on the ankle closest to the camera.

"Do you have to even film the walk THERE, Klaei?" The camera turned to the speaker, the one sitting in the main saddle of the wyvern as it walked awkwardly amongst the mess of people and horses. His wyvern knight helmet was removed and the strawberry-blonde hair tumbled down to his shoulders, accenting his almost purple eyes.

"Yes," came the reply from the one behind the camera, turning back over the group. "'cause I want to give a full view of the incident, plus for once the camera is fully charged and we have a LOT of film to kill, so..."

"Elimine, you're hopeless..."

"Well, since we lack a host, I'll narrate!" the camera-myrmidon stated cheerful, adjusting the camera and zooming in on a young lady, wearing all black clothing, sitting on the back of a large buckskin horse, Rose, the cleric lady from a previous shot, sitting behind her, arms around her waist, head resting on her black robes.

"Here, we see Rose and Kirra, the _hottest _lesbian couple in camp... Probably because they're the only ones in camp, but-" the lens shakes as the camera-myrmidon was hit roughly by the wyvern rider. "What?"

"They're not like that."

"...Uh-huh. And Talirei's straight." This time, he had to duck an arrow show his way, and grinned sheepishly at the nomadic trooper nearby, who aimed a glare in his direction. "Anyway... The male you just saw with the weird eyes and pretty blonde hair," he turned the camera back to the wyvern knight, who looked at the camera, flatly, "goes by Laurel. Isn't he just the cutest?"

"...Camera. Off. Me. Now."

"Fine."

The camera then turned back forward, towards the rather near town. There were a few shouts of 'Finally!', 'About time!', 'Thank Saint Elimine!', and the likes erupted from the odd little band as they entered the town. But one cry shook the whole group.

"I hate this!"

It came from Lavender, sounding fully feminine, as commanded, as he was lifted from the horse by Kana, since he was unable to walk, the front part of his dress with high slits falling between his legs, revealing his legs, so quite a few hormonally stressed boys whistles, and Lavender's face turned lovely shade of red, which accented perfectly the color they had applied to his lips.

"Ignore them," the swordmaster said, and the sage tightened his grip around Kana's neck, a little bit out of nerves but most of it out of anger and frustration as he noticed them nearing the largest building in the small town, with a hanging sign (that creaked a bit much for his liking) consisting of... Something, Lavender didn't much care, he was too busy trying to figure out why women liked to expose their midriff. But soon he was forced to focus on the numerous eyes that turned to him as Kana walked in to make book the rooms for the night. The innkeeper, a man around his thirties, eyed Lavender, with that greedy wanting gaze the poor sage had gotten about half the day, only much worse.

"Anything I can do for you today, sir, and... lady..." he said, not once looking at Kana. Or, for that matter, the camera-wielding myrmidon who was filming his every look and movement and word.

"Yes. I need the cost for a room, with two beds. My sister here is injured and we need to wait here for the rest of out group to arrive so she may be healed."

"How'd a lovely young lady like that hurt herself?"

"I..." Lavender said, using the most innocent, young, feminine voice he could muster, "fell from the back of my brother's horse, who is tied outside..."

"Oh, how awful... How about fifty gold a room?"

That was an amazing price, considering that the normal fee was around two-hundred gold a room. The camera myrmidon couldn't help snickering at the fact the innkeeper actually fell for it.

"Good. Then I need seven rooms," stated Kana, noting as the innkeeper nearly fell over. "And quite a few stables, mostly for horses, but for one Wyvern."

"What!"

"I said I had a group coming... And he's one of them," he said, motioning to the camera-myrmidon.

The camera lens made a nodding motion.

"Uh, Kana, we're running out of batter-"

Cut to black.

Cut to one of the rooms. Kana's apparently holding the camera and it's lens focused on Lavender, who is going through a bag, bent over, skirt showing a bit much skin on his legs and, erm, 'rump'. He then looks behind him, blinking, and frowning.

"Hey! Get that thing off me!"

The swordsman laughed, and pointed the camera down, but it was pointed up when the sage pulled off his top and tossed it to the floor. "My god, that's so uncomfortable... Wait. Do you have that back on me! Kana!"

The camera went flying as he was tackled by the sage, and he get an upside-down view of Lavender pining the swordmaster down, looking rather awkward, since he's straddling Kana and looks like a girl, and is not wearing a top.

"You know the camera's on?"

"Ugh!"

Shot of Lavender's hand up close. Cut to black.

Cut to the next morning, camera once more in the hands of the myrmidon, focused on Lavender, still in drag, brushing his now tangled light purple hair and walking down the stairs to the main room of the inn, followed by the camera-myrmidon, unnoticed. The innkeeper was one of the first down there, and he noticed the lovely lady Lavender descending the stairway. He took a seat in one of the chairs by the table, leaning back in his chair, brushing his hair with his fingers.

"Wow, missy, you're up early this morning."

The purple eyes looked to the innkeeper, and he accidentally blushed. "Um..." the feminine voice returned, "I guess I woke up early because I couldn't sleep well in.. the... bed..." the voice slowed as he noted the look he got from the innkeeper as the older man approached.

"Well, maybe you'd join me in _my _bed tonight."

The sage used his feet to pushed himself back and sound the back of his chair to the wall. A hand was on his shoulder and the other hand was in the split of the skirt, touching his thigh from the knee up. "Er," the sage said, awkwardly shifting.

"You're such a beautiful lady. Why travel? It cant be any good for your skin... Which is so soft..." The hand once on his shoulder now traced down his face, and Lavender leaned to the side to avoid the touch.

"Oh? What's the matter, my pet?"

"I-"

"Get your hand off him."

"Him!" the innkeeper jumped back. "What do you mean him!"

"That's a guy," stated the swordmaster, slowly descending the stairs, smirking. "We knew your weakness for woman and exploited that with our dear little Lavender."

"Kana!" the sage dropped the female voice, and jumped from his seat and rushed over, embracing him strongly. They had planned this, in case of emergency. The swordmaster wrapped his arms around the sage's waist and spun him around, planting a strong, forceful kiss on his lips, before placing him back on the ground beside him, arm still on his waist. "He pulled the act rather nicely, don't you think?"

The innkeeper practically gagged and ran off in the other direction. Kana released his grip on the sage's waist, laughing lightly, as did Lavender.

"That was once in a life time."

"Yeah," Kana jokingly looked to Lavender. "You do make a pretty girl, and we have some time before the others wake up..."

"Kana!" he flushed, but allowed the swordmaster to lead him up the stairs.

The myrmidon turned the camera around and put it on a table, talking into it. "And so, we see the making of a new couple. Or, rather, a couple that has been but we were to blink to notice it. Well, I'm officially disturbed. This is Klaei, signing out."

Cut to black.


	4. Chapter 4: Espionage and Spying

**Why You Don't Let Ocs Have A Camera**

**Chapter 4: Espionage and Spying**

_**A/N: Hope you all like the story. I WOULDN'T KNOW BECAUSE YOU SLACKERS DO NOT REVIEW! ahem Anyway, here we go.**_

_**Damien: ... Her? Own Fire Emblem? Hah.**_

_**WARNING: This chappy has a graphic in a depiction of shonen-ai/softcore yaoi and it may disturb a few.**_

Camera turns on. It's that same inn room, with the swordmaster and the sage, apparently rather occupied with each other and not noticing the camera turning on and being focused on them. Lavender's still in drag, but now, stripped down to the skirt, which is now fallen down between his legs, revealing every inch of his legs, and either knee is on the swordmaster's hips, and Kana is currently on his hands and knees, both hands on the sage's shoulders, and he's preoccupied kissing Lavender's chest and neck.

"Uhn... K-Kana..." murmured the sage as Kana kissed along his jaw line before nibbling his ear, causing him to moan softly. Then he kissed the male again, and the kiss was extremely deep, and Kana removed a hand from the male's shoulder and ran it up Lavender's leg, slipping inside the sage's skirt, between his legs. Then the sage gasped out, quickly flushing. "Kana... You just... You finger is..."

"I'm getting you ready, Lavender... Does it hurt too bad?"

The sage gasped again and gripped strongly onto the swordmaster's shoulders, body shaking all over, and he replied, weakly, "Yes, Kana... It... It hurts too much!"

"Then we will wait..." the swordmaster whispered into his ear, removing his hand from between the sage's legs, softly kissing the sage on the mouth.

Cut to black.

Camera turns on. Apparently, the camera-myrmidon does not know what he got on film before this. Scene of them on the road again, Kana and Lavender are on a large roan horse nearby, Rose and Kirra are sharing a horse as usual, Laurel (helmet intact) is on his wyvern with two people behind the saddle, both yet to be introduced, and both dressed all in black. Zoom of the first one, revealing white-blonde hair and dark, stormy blue eyes, and more distinct clothing details, such as a cloak/cape, a black band of cloth holding his hair back, and a vest as opposed to a usual top. Apparently, this figure is an assassin. And so is the other one, that is revealed when the camera shifts to him, revealing, again, all black clothing, more covered this time, the cloak/cape, pitch black hair to his shoulders, and yes, he, also, is an assassin.

"Here, we see Arithny and Jaeger. Arithny's the blonde," camera shifts to the blonde, then forward, a lovely view of dark both hair and light blue cloth. "...And this is Talirei's back."

"Stop wasting film and battery, Klaei."

"Awe, you're so pissed today, Talirei."

"Probably because someone wouldn't let me sleep because he was playing with the long-distance record/not record long distance controller."

The myrmidon chuckled nervously, and nearby, Kana and Lavender looked at each other, the sage blushing quite darkly.

"I don't see," the nomadic trooper said, tapping the sides of the horse with his boots lightly, speeding up slightly, "why you even left the camera in those two's room anyway."

"Simple," he said, shifting the camera to the swordsman and the sage. "I wanted to monitor exactly what the new couple did all night."

A forceful jab to the poor horse's sides from Kana, and the mare that he shared with Lavender muscled her way out of sight amongst the others. In the corner of the camera lens, it was rather obvious that the nomadic trooper rolled his eyes.

"Oh! Talirei!"

"Yeah?"

"Aren't we supposed to be meeting one of Laurel's-" the camera shifted to the wyvern knight upon the blue wyvern again, "friends in the next town?"

"He is not," the wyvern rider stated, not looking back, "my friend. He is an ex-fang and one of my greatest enemies, we are not friends."

"Well, if we're meeting someone else," stated the camera-myrmidon, turning the camera towards him, smiling brightly, "then we better save film. This is Klaei, signing out!"

Cut to black.

There was then a scene of a forest somewhere, the thief of chapter twohaving apparently taken the camera with his thiefly ways. The scene was bouncing, showing the probably didn't know it was on, until he looked into the lens, blinked his light blue eyes, and propped it on his shoulder as he had seen Klaei do.

"Welcome to Thief-Cam! Today, we will spy on my personal love slave, Damien. Though that monk's my competition..."

The blonde muttered a bit under his breath and then snuck into the back of a tent, where then we would see the mercenary from chapter 1, Damien, lying asleep, on a thin blanket. The thief creeps over... and finds himself immediately flipped over on his back, the camera upside down.

"Damnit, Larx! You're not allowed in my damn tent!"

"Ow! But, Damien...!" the thief sat up, pointing a bit, before he pathedically crawled over. Damien huffed and lay down, not looking at the thief. The thief grinned a bit, and snuggled up to Damien. He then reached over and turned off the camera.

Cut to black.

Cut to scene of them in town, apparently it's almost evening. How many days passed are impossible to tell...

"Hey!" came the enraged voice of the camera myrmidon. And we see him inspecting the camera, or, rather, he see as he moves it around, making viewer get seasick. "Someone dropped it! Who had it last?"

"I do believe..." came the voice of the blonde thief from a short time ago, "that you did. Remember? Just yesterday you were out wasting film and you dropped it..."

"... I... did?" came the confused voice of the myrmidon as the camera turned to the thief, who was seated high in a tree, so we mostly got a look as his feet an his 'rump'. He leans over and grins, eyes twinkling mischievously.

"Of course you did!"

The camera moved up and down as the myrmidon shrugged, then turned the camera to where a large Pegasus with a black mane stood, and beside it, stood a male Pegasus knight, apparently, with the clothing modified to meet his masculine needs, as one might expect. Down to about his shoulder blades was a dark purple shade of hair, contrasting the white cloth nicely. Apparently sensing the camera on him, he turned his head, scowling, but revealing eyes as dark a purple as his hair.

"Fucker. Get that damn camera off me!" he exclaimed, turning away again.

The myrmidon rolled his eyes, before turning the camera around, over the camp.

"That was our newest addition, Kilian," he said, holding the camera out in front of himself. "...We also regret to inform that, as of now, we have lost a member of our band, our shaman has departed out merry little band," he said, leaning against a considerately placed tree. "Since it's been some time since I used this handy little camcorder, I'm gonna catch you all up on some of the goings-on. Kana and Lavender split recently. I checked the film and, well, our earlier evidence shows that did get busy when I loaned them my camera..." he shook his head. "Talikins and I are having a bit of a tussle and Damien and Larx are being tolerant and the little thief's been sneaking into his tent a lot recently. Personally, I think they've got something going on... not the point though! Laurel, you remember him? Well. He's been extremely antsy since Kilian showed up. They must be former lovers and they still have feelings for each other. We're also planning on having a big celebration for the turning from winter to spring, and that's guaranteed to be interesting. Well, we I guess I need to turn this camera off. We're starting to lose battery and--"

"Klaei? We need to talk, honestly..."

The camera was placed carefully in a tree branch, and the purple-haired myrmidon turned, and looked over at the approaching nomadic trooper. He was dismounted, and his bandanna was gone, as were his bow and arrows. He was frowning and seemed up set, and he was nervously fiddling with the hem of his robe-like garb.

"...What is it?" Klaei said, voice showing concern, buy having a slight monotone to it. He was knocked backwards slightly by the nomadic trooper embracing him tightly, holding him close in a protective fashion.

"I was stupid. Stupid! I said I didn't know if this was working out... I was an idiot to think I could go without you! Please! Forgive me for making a fool of--"

He was silenced by the myrmidon kissing him. Softly, but a kiss nonetheless. The Nomadic trooper readjusted his hands so he now held him around the waist, and Klaei listed his hands and placed them on his chest. The nomadic trooper nibbled at his lower lip slightly causing him to gaps a little, and Talirei immediately pressed his tongue into the myrmidon's mouth. Klaei's hands gripped tightly the blue fabric of his lover's robe-like garb, pressing his body closer to the nomadic trooper's. Talirei then broke the kiss for a moment, preoccupying himself with kissing along his jaw line and neck. The myrmidon tilted his head back, moaning slightly. One of the nomadic trooper's hands has slunk slightly lower, onto Klaei's 'rump', groping slightly and biting the tender skin of Klaei's neck at the same time, making the myrmidon moan.

Cut to black thanks to low battery.

Cut to scene of the camp.

"Larx! Edit that tape!" the first sound that reached the camera was the myrmidon's shrill voice as he tried to steal the camera away. Now, the view from the camera provided the information that it was somewhere in a tree. And the exclamation of the myrmidon provided the extra information; it was being held captive by the thief. Said thief laughed and looked into the lens of the camera.

"Now, now, Klaei...! Be nice! Ask...!" the thief taunted, then turned the camera lens back to the Myrmidon, who was glaring fiercely.

"Damnit, Larx, I'll fucking murder you!" the myrmidon said, drawing his killing edge. The thief just laughed heartily.

"Honestly, who's going to see it? We all know you two have sex. As stated earlier, you're not quiet about it..." he said.

"..." the myrmidon sheathed his sword and then moodily stomped off. The thief then looked back into the camera.

"Now. This is typical behavior... This is your handsome guide to the insane hotel, Larx, signing out!"

Cut to black.

A/N: WOW that took a long time to write. Well.. I updatedomg. .. Yeah... lea humor. More slash. Oh well, do I hear any complaints? Didn't think so.


End file.
